I'm sure you've seen posts like this in your feed: a sign letting restaurant customers know that if they can't afford to tip, then they shouldn't be eating out. While this kind of messaging may seem educational – an effort to let customers know how the system really works – it’s condescending and inappropriate.
In my opinion, customers are obligated to meet the following codes of conduct:
✅ Be polite to staff
✅ Be respectful to the company’s policies and procedures
✅ Pay in accordance with the established terms
Customers are not required to:
✅ Show loyalty
✅ Provide positive word of mouth
✅ Pay extra beyond the amount billed for goods and services
Many people like to view tipping as a uniquely North American habit, and thus either outdated and foolish, or an important way to support the service industry. Some will explain how tipping started as a form of compensation for Black slaves who were not allowed to receive formal payment, and thus should be banned as a form of respect. And others will explain how tipping is based on an established system and not doing so is rude.
My view is that, for better or for worse, tipping is an established form of reward for those providing a service. It’s a way of saying their extra efforts have been acknowledged and appreciated. While not required, it should be appreciated when done.
The problem is when tipping becomes expected. This seems to be especially evident in the restaurant industry, where customers are asked to tip everyone from front counter staff who simply take your order, to the server who brings you your food.
When it comes to “educating” customers, I would say to any restaurant owner or manager that they should spend less effort encouraging customers to tip, and put more effort into paying their staff a living wage. And for staff, I would suggest they need to understand they are dealing with people from all walks of life. Some will tip generously, and others may not tip at all. If this is a situation you are having trouble with, then perhaps you should think about another line of work.
And for customers who feel a strong sense of entitlement, believing they deserve to be waited on hand and foot, understand that the person serving you works very hard and you are not their only customer.
While you may get servers who are rude or incompetent, you will also receive ones that are professional, courteous, and attentive. Showing appreciation for a job well done is never a bad thing. Unless of course they expect it either way.
